With love! I am not from the South and lived there for about 6 years. Everyone has their own private recipe, and different regions have different policies. (I did not choose that word lightly.) Here is the best all around primer on grits that I keep returning to. http://www.bonappetit.com/tipstools/tips/2009/03/how_to_cook_grits

And remember there are as many ways to cook grits as there are to .... can't think of an analogy but you get it.
Happy holidays.