Pronounced “out-smiter,” uitsmijter translates to “bouncer,” and refers to the large man who has the power to toss you out of the club for your excesses. Essentially an open-faced sandwich of ham and fried eggs, uitsmijter is the kind of thing we all need on occasion. As breakfast it is restorative, but it is a dish at its best when you cook it up after returning home from the bar, before you crumple into bed. It’s scalable, so if you’re feeding an additional drunk person (or drunk people), you can simply multiply the recipe by as much as you need to. This recipe comes from my cookbook Dutch Feast. —Emily Wight
Test Kitchen Notes
For more on how to make crackers, see the full article. —The Editors
canola or other neutral oil
room temperature butter
thick slices soft white or dark rye bread
grainy Dijon mustard
(25g) thinly sliced gouda cheese
(50g) thinly sliced deli ham
small tomato, thinly sliced
salt and pepper, to taste
In This Recipe
Preheat oven to 350° F.
In a frying pan on high, heat oil. Crack egg(s) into pan. Once the whites begin to turn opaque, about 30 seconds, put pan into oven and turn off heat. Set a timer for 5 minutes.
Meanwhile, butter both slices of bread, and spread mustard on 1 slice. Pile cheese, ham, and tomato slices on bread. Sprinkle tomatoes with a pinch of black pepper.
Place cooked egg on tomato slices, then sprinkle with a pinch of salt and another pinch of pepper, if desired.
Top with a second slice of bread, then eat the whole thing standing over the kitchen sink before heading straight to bed.