I was just gifted two pints of half and half (odd, I know). What do I do with it?

White Russians. One shot vodka. Two shots Kahlua. Top with half & half.

PUNCH BOWL WHITE RUSSIANS.

David Lebovitz's vanilla ice cream. Oh oh so good. Use the extra egg yolks. You will never buy vanilla ice cream again. I use half and half instead of milk and cream. Chocolate ganache makes a perfect topping.

Quiche, bread pudding, Mac and cheese.

Soups, sauces, in your coffee...

I would use it to make a couple batches of a nice cheesy cream sauce ... maybe with some crab or your favorite item in it, then pop in the freezer to pull out one day to put with fresh pasta for a nice dinner when you don't have time for a slow meal. Maybe put mushrooms in one, or asparagus, or .......

And maybe some ricotta - I think the half and half will sub nicely for milk and cream.

Make some crème fraîche! You'll extend its shelf life, and then you can make even more things.
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Ice Cream, Steak au Poivre, or Cheese.