A Conversational Guide to Eggnog

In 2019, Americans spent more than $150 million on eggnog—which, at the time, meant roughly 50 million bottles of that festive cream and egg beverage traveled from grocery store shelves and into the bourbon-soaked, nutmeg-topped punch bowls found at every halfway decent holiday party. In a perfect world, those numbers would be much larger (and not because of inflation). Why? Eggnog makes the holidays better, sweeter, warmer, and the right amount of ridiculous.

Of course, if you’re new to eggnog (which I was until only a few years ago) its tradition—and general strangeness—can be intimidating. Today, we’re here to alleviate any fears you might have of talkin’ nog with one of the drink’s many, loyal fans. Without further ado, here’s our conversational guide to eggnog.

An Elephant: The animal that Charles Mingus’s eggnog recipe could, allegedly, sedate. Upon reviewing his version’s ingredients list, I’d deem this plausible: The famed bassist adds a shot of both 151 rum and whiskey per drink. Legally, we cannot recommend this—but we fully endorse Mingus entrusting vanilla ice cream to keep his eggnog cold.

Coquito: Puerto Rico’s take of the classic holiday concoction. Marrying coconut and citrus with spices like cardamom and star anise, coquito strikes the perfect balance of warmth and refreshment. Meaning, it’s very, very hard to stop drinking—especially if it's César’s recipe.

Erik Lombardo: Creator of the most popular eggnog recipe on our site. Owner of a perfect, five-star rating as well as a member of The Five Ingredients Or Less club, this is as decorated a cocktail as you’ll find in the Food52 recipe universe.

Membership to The Jelly Of The Month club: The gift that keeps on giving the whole year. Also, the precursor to our topic’s most memorable moment in film. And if you’re nervous about making eggnog for the first time, consider this: It is the only food and drink the Griswolds managed not to ruin.

Posset: Eggnog’s medieval ancestor. Typically, a warm mixture of sugar and cream curdled by alcohol. Sounds horrible; likely was. Appears in Hamlet and Macbeth—in both instances, posset owns objectively bad vibes. In short, stay away from this stuff.

The best store bought eggnog: A question our team answered last year. Here’s a quick summary of our findings: 1) We’ve yet to find a plant-based nog worth our time or whiskey (somebody please fix this); 2) Lactaid’s version could fool an untrained palate; and 3) the big brands know what they’re doing.

Tom & Jerry: Eggnog, but hot and—since the egg whites are separated and whipped into peaks before rejoining the yolks—fluffy. Invented by British writer Pierce Egan, this Tom & Jerry predates the cat and mouse cartoon by more than 100 years. It’s also really delicious, and thanks to this recipe, quite easy to make.

West Point, New York: The site of the Eggnog Riot. TLDR; In 1826, cadets were barred from consuming alcohol at the United States Military Academy. Enraged by the potential of a hoochless holiday, a few dissenting cadets boated across the Hudson River to smuggle over 3 gallons of whiskey into the batch of eggnog brewing inside the academy’s barracks. Then, they had a party. Then the party was shut down, which then made people upset, which then led to 20 cadets being court-martialed (not good).

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What's your favorite eggnog recipe? Let us know in the comments below!