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Devoted reader, know this about today's menu: it is written aspirationally, by a stuck-in-the-city New Yorker who dreams of the smell of flaming hot barbeques and the perfect, irreplaceably smokey burgers that they produce. Such burgers are the stuff of hazy summer dreams -- egg yolk-y yellow cheese oozing over a juicily charred, misshapen patty, mashed between squishy white buns and falling apart at every bite. Softly pink, and fruity sweet watermelonade is just the thing to wash that marvelous mess down.
This meal must be eaten outdoors, and surrounded by as much lush greenery as your little patch of the world allows and that's a fact.
Grocery List (serves 4, with Watermelonade to spare)
2 pounds 80-85% lean ground beef (best quality possible)
1/2 cup maple syrup
8 slices thick applewood smoked bacon
2 MacIntosh apples
8 slices Vermont cheddar
4 Bulkie rolls (or any burger bun will do)
We assume you have lemons, sugar, salt, and pepper. If not, you might not actually own a kitchen.
1. This meal is mostly about prep. Slice the apples (sprinkle with lemon juice), cube the watermelon, make sugar syrup, slice the cheese, fry the bacon, form the patties. All of these things can and should happen first, though the order in which they do is up to you!
2. After all that prep is finished, and the patties are chilling in the fridge and so on, I would make the watermelonade before dealing with the burgers, perhaps while the barbeque heats up! Let it chill in the fridge until you're ready, or better yet, sip while you grill!
3. Serve! Probably with a lovely sunset and lots of Wet-Naps. Expect raves and 100% pure contentment.