I'm a lawyer, and in the past week 2 judges in front of whom I regularly practice have lost their wives. I want to bring by some food. I'll be making it the night before, boxing it up and putting it in a bag, and then bringing it to court and putting it in their fridge for them to take home and reheat (I don't want to actually go to their homes and cook because I think that would look inappropriate, and also they might not want me to invade their privacy at this time). Any suggestions of what to make/take and the best way to do this would be great. I really like both of them and they are both devistated, obviously.
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I'm a Southerner, and the practice of taking food to a home when there has been a death is well established; you need to be able to easily feed all the out-of-town kin who come in. But this is well after the fact, so we're looking for something that (a) is better suited for one person, and (b) simply says, "I'm thinking of you." To me, a pie or a loaf of sweet bread says that. If you're bound and determined to do a meal, think about a homemade "TV dinner," an entree and a side or two in single-portion size.
While bringing food can relieve a huge burden, it can also create problems. My friend's small family received so much food both before and after she died, they were often throwing food out. People they didn't know very well would bring food in dishes that had to be returned and some things had questionable ingredients.
I just wanted to share this because if you can think of other ways to offer your condolences - a charity donation, a card, etc. - you all might benefit. Think of your own comfort level with a fridge full of home-cooked food, from people you only know professionally.
It sounds like there are a lot of factors to consider. I wish you well in your endeavor.
You made a comment about "invading their privacy;" my concern is really about that--it's lovely that you want to help, but I wouldn't want you to do anything that could be misinterpreted and possibly jeopardize your carrer.