It seems no matter what I do my "extra firm" tofu is still not very firm. I am not sure what I am doing wrong, and why I can't get it into a firmer steak like texture? Any suggestions?
Do you drain it for long enough? Put it between two plates with a weight on top for about an hour. If that doesn't solve the problem, try a different brand.
Going for 'steak like texture' is a problem, you're not going to get that with Tofu.
While draining and pressing will firm it up..it will not be steak like.
In fact try not to replicate steak and use veggies for what they are they. "tempheh" or "Age (aahgee) Tofu" (which is a tougher pre-fried tofu sold semi dry--in Asian stores in cooler section). Those might be the texture your'e looking for...but go with veggies---and if a more 'meaty' texture is desired use portobello mushrooms.
I do what lloreen advises. I place the tofu between two plates at least a day before I plan to use it. I also wrap the tofu in a dish towel and change it 2x3 times. The towel absorbs the water. For a weight I use a six pack of beer or a kitchen brick. I also finding baking tofu, with no sauces, gives a good texture.