Whats a good dessert to make after spicy rice starters and main?

fresh assorted berries, honey glaze drizzle, lime creme fraiche sorbet and a shortbread cookie.

I just had osmanthus gelatin at dimsum and found this version with a layer of coconut. A world apart but I think this is great for a light, fun dessert. http://thedomesticgoddesswannabe.com/2016/05/osmanthus-and-coconut-jelly-%E6%A1%82%E8%8A%B1%E6%A4%B0%E5%A5%B6%E6%9E%9C%E5%86%BB/

A friend from India gave us this recipe & its fool proof - really good vanilla ice cream in a pool of mango puree. She told us to buy a can on mango puree in the Indian aisle/market because she says there aren't mangoes in the US that compare.

Think texture..
Soft rice then to soft custard and sorbet?? Something with some dente.. A rustic fruit tart with a scoop of home made citrus sorbet.

i like icy cold citrus medallions or mango pudding.

Panna Cotta!!

Mexican Flan

Fruit pavlova or trifle

I would do a panna cotta, unless your meal was particularly dairy-heavy.

Mango fool http://www.africanbites.com/mango-fool/

Sherbet

Lemon mascarpone ice cream with fresh blueberry sauce.

To cool thinks off after a spicy meal, I would go with a dairy-based dessert like kulfi (my current obsession).

A fruit sorbet, fruit ice or granita would be lovely. What about Amanda Hesser's strawberry ice with condensed milk and whipped cream? https://food52.com/recipes/56902-strawberry-ice-with-condensed-milk-and-whipped-cream

Or if you are looking for something super simple like whipped greek yogurt and fresh seasonal fruit.
http://www.seriouseats.com/2017/07/how-to-make-whipped-greek-yogurt.html

Mango Lassi / watermelon granita or salad / I like the fruit salad idea too.

I'm agreeing with you on the cold-and-refreshing; how about a watermelon-lime sorbet? The other option could be cool and creamy, such as a coconut custard or coconut ice cream. Even a big bowl of cut up mixed tropical fruits, served well-chilled, could be a nice counterpoint to the texture and spice of the rice. I am not sure what fruits are native to W. Africa, but melons and lime do grow on the continent.