This is truly a luxury problem but I struggle with this every Thanksgiving. Would love to know other people's thoughts and tactics!
It's the issue of people loading up on all the delicious appetizers and ruining their hunger for the main meal. Obviously, if people have traveled and it's hours to dinner, they must be fed! But I ask the local folks to arrive between 2 and 3, for dinner between 4 and 5. Even then, the last guests don't usually leave until about midnight.
We do assigned dishes and these folks are all wonderful cooks - it's always a lovely feast. But even if I tell people not to bring extra, in the joyful spirit of the day they always do, usually appetizers or extra desserts, and it would be rude not to put them out.
I've noticed the last couple of holidays that there is so much left over of the main dishes. Not than anyone minds the leftovers!
I'm wondering if I should tell people not to bring appetizers and I'll put out a very simple selection. Or should I just fuggedaboutit, be grateful for everything, and let providence take over?
Would love your thoughts.